How I jinxed myself
by Sasuyara
Summary: Aleuji - The dead but awake. This is how I was turned into one of them and live my days in a body not originally mine. Here I tell you about my story and just how I jinxed myself to wake up in the body of a female Severus Snape. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The End and the beginning

When I died I went over. Over to another sphere where I was to be judged, and judge me they did.

I believed there would be no more than two options between which they would choose. As you already know, I was wrong.

There was a third option. The option to return and be one of the Aleuji. The dead but awake.

They decided on the third option for me. I didn't care much either way. I liked to take things as they came and accepted my fate.

What I didn't know, was where my new life would start. That I could start over somewhere different altogether didn't occur to me till I heard them discussing it. I held no power over their decision and what threw me most, was their obvious belief of the existence of different universes. And the names they dropped. Edogawa, Monkey, Baggins, Poppins, Everdeen and much more.

I was confused. Did these worlds I read about really exist? They seemed to do..

They finally settled on Potter. I would start over in a world of magic, which was exciting but worrying at once. I was imagining waking up in the body of some hated character, like Dolohov, Flint or (god forbid) Umbridge. My thoughts started to drift. I hoped to stay female. Imagine waking up with a dick (urg).

Or, like, waking up as a female Snape!

And it seemed like this I Managed to jinx myself. But it took me a few months to realize this.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer ( I will not do this for every chapter, since it would get tiering)

I do not own Harry Potter or any of the canon characters. I own my OC And the idea of this story. You might recognise a few (or a lot) elements since I have read a lot of fanfiction and have been inspired by them.

Chapter 2

The Aleuji

The Aleuji are Souls which have been returned to the living world. Most return to the world they died in. The world they were born and lived in. There was not all to much to say about them. There were some souls who, like me, were sent to a different universe. There were a lot to choose from. Both known and unknown.

What I learned in the time between the decision and my rebirth while I was floating in a sphere with others ( All Aleuji. All waiting.) was that we were sent without knowledge about our new lives. A lot of us worried about gender ( I was almost a 100% certain I would be female again). Most worried about their families ( _I didn't. In my Family everyone had to fend for themselves. We were no unit_). How would it feel to have to replace them? (_would I miss my independence?_) How much of the before would we remember? ( _All of it I hoped. Living in the world of Harry Potter and being unprepared for Voldemort would be a bitch_) Would we miss them? Would we live on the same continent?

( _I knew I wouldn't. A new world it was for me_)

Some of us took the time to come to terms with their death and some tried to ignore it. Ignore their brothers and sisters. Because that is what we are. We come from different times, different worlds, different continents. But we all speak one language. The language of the dead. A language only dead souls (or rather, souls which remember their death) could understand.

I took this time to reflect. To plan.

Who had I been? I was Anastasia, but I had been called Nastja. My Grandparents were rich businessman in Russia and so my mother grew up with the expectation to inherit. She had been under the impression she would not have to lift a hand to work and could reap all the benefits of having rich parents. My father had been under the same impression. He did not marry mother out of love but out of greed.

When Grandmother and Grandfather found out their daughter married a good for nothing and didn't plan on working they were furious. They disinherited her. By then mother had me and my brother. They, by nature, had not been warm people. But without the money they relied on, without a job… they grew resentful. Me and my brother had a hard time growing up. No parents to love us. At most they provided us with food. Clothes were sparse. And kind words did not exist. Mother blamed father for her misfortune. Father blamed her for… well...everything. For loosing him money. For being too poor to be able to divorce. For giving birth to us. For robbing him of his shining future.

They would argue. The would yell. They would hit. It was free for all. They were not above of hitting us. They were not above of having us sleep outside in the cold. They did not care. My brother, who had been older remembered how it was to have money, to be well cared for. He did not like his situation. And he blamed our parents. He hated them ( I did too. Still do). Everyone tried to one up the other and it grew tiring.

And then I remember my Grandparents visiting. I had been 9 at the time.

They were horrified and took my brother and me in. I was able to experience a good education and made a master in arts. Life was good. I didn't have to see my parents. My brother moved out not long after my 12 birthday and I had my Grandparents for myself. I was 21 when I ran into my father again. He had remarried and his new wife was an old shrew, not that he cared.

I ignored them. They did not matter to me. But father still held something for me.

That night was the last night I lived as Anastasia. He followed me. And he killed me. According to him I stole what was rightly his and he wanted to take it back.

I still remember his hand in my face. Grabbing. And then bashing my head against a wall. I remember his hits, his kicks and I remember his knife. It's glint in the light, coated in my blood and his relieved, elated smile.

And I swore. Never again.

Being a part of the Aleuji let me see a lot of my faults. I realized how cold my parents treatment left me. No matter what my Grandparents did, some of it would remain. I was sarcastic and tended to dismiss other people's feelings and was all around antisocial. This would change.

And then I would think about the Harry Potter world. Al I knew, was I would be reborn there. Would I have magic? Would I be born in Tom's era? Would I go to school with the marauders? Or would I join the golden trio?

I decided most of my time would be spent in the Room of Requirements. I planned to look into every nook and cranny. Take everything I liked. And it would be where I would learn. The Rest would have to be adjusted.

Time in the between was different for everyone. It let us work through our issues before moving on. The feeling of moving on was a strange one. One moment you are surrounded by others, next it's dark.

In this darkness I felt a warmth. And I sucked it up like a sponge. I pulled it towards me because it was the first time since the between I could physically _feel_. I was greedy and took everything I could. It took me some time to realize I was most probably feeding off on my mother's magic and sucking her dry. So I slowed down.

Then I was born.

„Nerezza Snape."

Please apologize for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes


End file.
